Wednesday, November 20, 2019
How to overcome the feeling of FOMO so you can be happier
How to overcome the feeling of FOMO so you can be happier How to overcome the feeling of FOMO so you can be happier FOMO has been around since the beginning of time, but itâs become an even bigger part of our lives because of the amplifying powers of social media.It happens to all of us. We log on, scroll, and suddenly weâre comparing ourselves to these filtered, curated versions of everyone elseâs perfect-seeming lives. Immediately, it makes us jealous. As a result, we begin to feel weâre missing out on something huge. Before too long, weâre living full-time in someone elseâs head, living someone elseâs dream, and trying to be significant by measuring ourselves against impossible metrics. This is no way to live. It holds us back because it encourages us to obsess over the things we lack instead of the things we already possess?- ?like our own unique abilities, traits, and ambitions.If you want to be successful, you have to find a way to stop doing this. You have to overcome the power of FOMO.Hereâs how.Recognize FOMO as superficialHereâs the truth: many of the things we feel like weâre missing out on when scrolling through social media arenât even things we actually want to do.For example, as I was making a name for myself in my 20âs, I wanted only a few specific things: success, respect, and financial security for my family.One thing I never coveted? Going to high-end parties and looking significant. Yet thatâs exactly what I began to feel I was missing out on.Why? Because thatâs what folks who were suddenly my peers seemed to be doing?- ?driving fancy cars, going to nightclubs, buying bottle service. I thought these were things I was supposed t o be doing. But then, in time, I asked myself, âWhy?â Why do I think Iâm supposed to do these things? I realized, ultimately, that the pressure was entirely self-imposed. I was fueling my own FOMO.Focus on what your own values and dreams areOkay, hereâs another truth: FOMO is actually a good thing, because it can inspire us to more consciously pursue our dreams.For example, I feel FOMO today if I donât get to bed early because I know it will mean I canât work out the next morning. I feel FOMO when Iâm not writing, when Iâm not creating podcasts, when Iâm not with my kids at their baseball and softball games. I fear missing out on these things because theyâre what I truly care about.I bet you have a similar set of pursuits that are important to you?- ?and I bet none of them have anything to do with social media or the things you witness people doing there.Thatâs why, when it comes to combating that kind of FOMO?- ?the superficial, social media kind?- ?reminding yourself of what your dreams actually are is the best thing you can do. We should really only ever feel FOMO when weâre not doing things we truly love. The key is reminding yourself of those things?- ?of your more genuine and honest ambitions?- ?and then calibrating your life and your mental state to only worry about missing out on them.Ask yourself: what really lights you up?What makes you truly happy? What makes you feel satisfied, like youâre on track, like youâre doing what you really are supposed to be doing? What lights you up? Remind yourself of those things, then forget about the rest. Social media-bred FOMO encourages us to forget about what truly drives us, what we value in our soul.Thatâs why, at the end of the day, combating it really does entail reflecting on and recentering our lives around those goals we actually want to achieve, the dreams we actually want to live for.Ultimately, this amounts to living for yourself as opposed to the one-dimensional representations you see on your phone or computer every day.Trust me: itâs a much more fulfilling way of living life.This article was originally published on Quora.
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